What I’m going to say is pretty bold, but I stand by it completely. 

All the relationship advice you get from me or anyone else is only 50% effective if you don’t exercise. That’s right. I’m saying that if you don’t workout, you leave on the table at least 50% of the benefits of all the effort you put into any relationship, be it personal or professional. 

But here’s the thing – I don’t mean hour long gym sessions or HIIT workouts a couple times a week. I mean any amount of exercise. That could mean a 15 minute yoga session, a 10 minute stretch, or even dancing for 5 minutes straight. And while there’s health benefits and feel good chemicals from doing them, my reasoning doesn’t involve that – which is why I’m suggesting that you do whatever the hell you want to do as long as you get your body moving. Why?

It’s all about being present. 

I cannot understate the impact of being present when interacting with others. There’s a reason many therapists, counsellors, and coaches implement a 5 minute meditation/exercise in the beginning of sessions that gets you to focus on your breathing and what you’re physically feeling. When you’re connected to your body and you’re present in the moment, there’s a significant jump in clarity and confidence in the way you think and react. You may not realize it, but to the trained eye, there’s a stark difference. 

When you’re present, your background thoughts won’t have an effect on what you’re saying. You’ll have a stronger ability to be aware of what you want. You’ll have a lot more control of what you’re communicating and how you’re perceived. And just a little bit of exercise everyday can get you there by getting you connected to your body which in turn allows you to bring yourself to the present, often subconsciously.

Now I’m not saying that the more you exercise, the better your relationships will be. My point isn’t about physical fitness, it’s about feeling the muscles in your body – which doesn’t require all too much. 

A couple minutes of strenuous movement a day might seem like it would bring inconsequential benefits. But if you really think about it, getting less than 8 hours of sleep a day can noticeably decrease your mental stamina while increasing your risk of developing alzheimer’s, yet a good night’s sleep is still considered a luxury. So you have to admit that we have the tendency to dismiss simple habits that have the power to drastically improve our quality of life. 

So work up a little sweat everyday and start paying attention to the muscles that we often fall asleep to. You’ll be surprised at how your conversations will start to feel just a little more fulfilling.